May 26th, 2006

there!, Hello

So, I Suppose I Have a Long Way to Go

I stole this from angelinehawkes. If y'all haven't read her, then immediately pick up Clash of Steel 3: Demon (which also includes stories from such wonderful writers as Steven Shrewsbury and Trista Robichaud--yep, THAT Trista Robichaud). Buy it here.

Without further ado:

You aren’t a true Horror/Sci Fi/Fantasy writer until you’ve written and sold:


a cat story “Puss' Fortune”, Twisted Cat Tales, Coscom Entertainment

a vampire story “One Drop of Blood, One Year of Life”, Vintage Moon, coming soon from RAGEmachine Press; "The Vampire Switch" The GHostbreakers: Vampire Hunters from RAGEmachine Press.

a zombie story “R 'n R Will Never D" The Dream People, Issue 24; also "The Dread Menace" chapter for Eden Studio's Worlds of the Dead rpg supplement.

a confused alien story: Not yet

a story about being a writer: Not yet

a story set in a book store how about one in a Pawn Shop? Alas, not yet.

a story about a school exam Not yet.

a time travel/paradox story Nope.

an homage/pastiche "Frosted Glass" was an HP Lovecraft pastiche that was sold to The Pen, the journal of creative fiction at my undergraduate university. The magazine folded before the story came out though. The money was good. :) 15 bucks!

a sword-maiden story :Not yet.

a precocious child story : "Terry Finch and the Myth Magician" published in Dark Annie back in 1998.

a time travel story Isn't this the same as the time travel/paradox story? Well, I still haven't sold any, yet. :) But I'm hopeful.

a generic medieval fantasy story : Hmm. Generic medieval fantasy story. Not sold, and hopefully never will be read. So. No.

a dragon story : Nope.

a telepathic animal story : I hope never. Few things bother me more than telepathic animal stories, alas.

a human mating with an alien story : Arguably, the first story I ever published. Back in a magazine in high school was a post apocalyptic sf story about humans who had mated with aliens and ultimately became techless savages... Alas I cannot recall the name of my High School's publication or my story... Lost to time they are. Perhaps this is for the best.

a scary house story : How about a scary soup kitchen story? Got one of those. "Gimme Shelter" in the upcoming Vermin anthology from Carnifex Press.

a special (prince/ss extra gifted) saves the world story : Arguably "Terry Finch and the Myth Magician" can fill this role, too. :)

a my female characters look like Pamela Anderson story : Hmmm. Well, some of my psuedonymous stuff "Chuck Cave and the Vanishing Vixen" or "Rick Cave and the Positronic Pretty" would fit here. Yeah, they specifically asked for "well rounded characters" so... :) Available through Man's Story 2 or Androids 2.

a quest story : From Hell's Heart, novella coming soon.

a found artifact and bad shit happens story : Arguably, this also plays into From Hell's Heart, a coming soon novella

a space ship battle story : Well, I penned a pseudonymous story which had space ships and battles (though these were seperate entities) called "Rick Cave and the Positronic Pretty" for Androids 2.

a handwavium perfectum scientificum story : Ah. Not sure about this one. :) "The Vampire Switch" in the antho The Ghostbreakers: Vampire Hunters might arguably be one of these (from RAGEmachine Press).

a romance story dressed up to be a fantasy or science fiction story: Arguably, "Rick Cave and the Positronic Pretty" fits this bill, too.

a story where a character crawls through ducts : I was pulling out all the stops for "Rick Cave and the Positronic Pretty." Yeah, it incorporates this element briefly. Can you see why it was pseudonymous?

a theological rant dressed up like a story : Actually pulled out one of these recently to batter into shape, and have been systematically removing the theological rant aspects. :) Haven't sold any, no.

a cyberpunk story where all the faked up technology already exists but the writer is too clueless to realize it story : I like to think I have a clue. Haven't sold any cyberpunk, though.

a fantasy story with dirt floors and peasants : Uhm. Not yet.
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